A little surprise can brighten a day

Little notes filled with amorous words

My honey and I recently got hitched. It was a pretty great time, and we were blessed with a huge amount of family support. One of my favorite things was the advice that I was “showered” with for my bridal shower. All my aunts and grandmothers wrote me little tidbits of advice for a long happy marriage. My grandparents have been together for 55-60 years each. My aunts and uncles, 30 or so.

What was great about the advice was the surprise that my husband and I already do some of the things. A few times this year, I’ve been taken away on trips–one for business, one for family. We spend a lot of time together, as we have worked with one another (so to speak) for three years. When I left both times, I had the opportunity to slyly leave Jake little notes for him to find later.  A note in the coffee can, one on the TV, one on the computer, in the shower, on the fridge. Each one said something different–something sweet, cute, funny, and dirty (of course!). It was fun for him to find all the notes while I was gone–especially when one was evading him even upon my return! 

Lots of ways to say it

Little things like that show a person you are thinking about them. Thoughtful notes now and again, out of the blue, can really strengthen a relationship and keep it fun and interesting. Who knows what a well-placed and cleverly timed note could do for a marriage? 

© Be Nice. Creator and Be Nice. (somethingsonice.wordpress.com), 2008-2009

New postcard: wash those hands folks!

Soap + H2O = Nice

 

Hope you enjoy this one! Easy way to be nice, isn’t it?

© Be Nice. Creator and Be Nice. (somethingsonice.wordpress.com), 2008-2009.

Cleanliness is kindness

This post is in conjunction with the release of my newest postcard about washing hands. I thought up the postcard awhile ago, but it seems appropriate that it is being released now during the beginning of flu season.  Washing your hands is a conscientious thing to do in these germy times. While I do think some things take it too far (like anti-bacterial body wash and facial tissues), basic cleanliness and caution is always advisable. You never know if the person standing next to you might have some condition that makes them susceptible to illness, and while you may feel healthy, you may still have yucky germy-things that can make others sick.

Case-in-point: at my job, there is a woman who sits nearby that never covers her mouth when she coughs or sneezes. And she does it a lot!  Imagine all the germs that may be flung into the air each time she sneezes!  Or the women that leave the bathroom without washing their hands at work. EW. I know a person who is allergic to the hand soap in her work restroom, so she brings her own. Now that is considerate! So these non-handwashers have no excuse, wouldn’t you say?

But I think many of us believe that simply running our hands under some water (sans soap) will clean them up. This is not the case. My friend Mandy, a medical professional, explained to me that it is the friction that comes with hand-washing (plus the warm water and soap) that frees up the spores and whatnot attached to our skin, which makes our hands clean. This is the purpose behind the 15 second rule for hand washing. I had no idea. I thought that was a rule made up to get people to wash in general (ask for 15 seconds, and you’ll get the 5 seconds necessary–seemed to make sense). So I guess we all better do a stand-up job at hand washing. Remember, you can get yourself sick too by touching some communal item and then touching your face! Cleanliness helps everyone!

Below I have attached the CDC guidelines for proper hand washing. You can find the info here. For a cuter website with an awesome rubber ducky in its heading, check this link out: washinghands.net. This website is a great resource for all things handwashing related!

Steps to proper handwashing…

1. Hands should be washed using soap and warm, running water
2. Hands should be rubbed vigorously during washing for at least 20 seconds with special attention paid to the backs of the hands, wrists, between the fingers and under the fingernails
3. Hands should be rinse well while leaving the water running
4. With the water running, hands should be dried with a single-use towel
5. Turn off the water using a paper towel, covering washed hands to prevent re-contamination.

 

Hands should be washed after the following activities:

• After touching bare human body parts other than clean hands and clean, exposed portions of arms
• After using the toilet
• After coughing, sneezing, using a handkerchief or disposable tissue, using tobacco, eating or drinking
• After handling soiled equipment or utensils
• After food preparation, as often as necessary to remove soil and contamination and to prevent cross-contamination when changing tasks
• After switching between working with raw food and working with ready-to-eat food
• After engaging in other activities that contaminate the hands.

 

Note:  The VSP does not endorse the use of hand sanitizers in lieu of handwashing with soap and warm, running water.  Hand sanitizers containing 60-90% ethyl alcohol or isopropanol in concentration with equivalent sanitizing strength, may be used as an adjunct to proper handwashing.

 

© Be Nice. Creator and Be Nice. (somethingsonice.wordpress.com), 2008-2009.

Amicable Allegory #7: Lost, found, returned

My last post, “500 bucks richer for a poor person“ is related to this post, except that this post is a more positive version of the subject!  (On a side note, thanks to Autumn for her comment requesting more positive entries. Though it is my aim to promote positivity, sometimes I go about addressing positivity by deliberating on how I can handle less positive interactions. Thank you Autumn for the reminder that all things are good–in balance. So, on with the positive!)

Yesterday, I was picking up some items at the mall conversing (as always) with the sales ladies about random things.  One of the women told me of a day when she found a wallet in a parking lot with a moderate amount of money in it. She Facebooked the guy and arranged to return it to him, she told me.  I was so impressed–and encouraged, especially after the $500 woman last week! I asked the sales lady then if the man had given her a reward or anything.  She said “No, but he was a student and I bet he didn’t have much to spare. — But the next week I was on campus and I found a 100 dollar bill on the ground!  I thought to myself–this is what good deeds get you!”  I have to say, I totally agree! Wouldn’t it be great if that happened to all of us!

Have you ever been so focused on what you’re going to do next that you don’t pay attention to what you’re doing at that moment?  My friend had gone grocery shopping one afternoon this summer and returned all the way home with her thoughts on the tasks awaiting her there when she realized she had left her purse in the cart in the parking lot!  In a panic she flew back to the supermarket, all-the-while thinking of what she had in her purse that could be stolen or misused.  She quickly walked to the customer service desk, anxiety growing in her mind. She budged in line (I imagine this was a pretty justifiable budge!) to ask after her purse and there it was, everything in tact!  She asked who had left it, but the worker said the woman had not left her information.  Thrilled, relieved, and grateful, my friend walked slowly back to her car wondering how she would ever thank the person for their kind deed.  That evening, she placed an ad in the local paper, saying simply, “To the kind woman who found my purse and returned it, thank you!” What I love about this story is that not only did someone do the right, kind thing, but my friend went out of her way to thank them for it, even when she did not know who it was!  Kind deeds become a little more special with a hardy “thank you!”

 

© Be Nice. Creator and Be Nice. (somethingsonice.wordpress.com), 2008-2009.

500 bucks richer for a poor person

At work the other day, I was conversing with a lady about her first bus-riding experience, of which she shared her very unusual experience.  Only she and a blind man were riding the bus at the time when she noticed a wallet under a seat close by. She picked it up, inspected it, and found $500 inside. After an astonished pause, I asked, “Did they have an address in there to mail it to?” She replied, “Well, I called all the numbers in the wallet but none of them were in service, so I mailed it back to the person.” She then cackled and said, “But I kept the 500 bucks! I mean, he should be grateful just to get his wallet back.”

She kept the money. She. Kept. The. Money. ICK! She was so proud of herself for her profit from someone else’s misfortune. How do you respond to that?  Being at work I couldn’t react with the disgust and revulsion I felt, so I neutrally stated how happy he would be to have his wallet back, since it can be such a pain to replace personal documents. But inside I just could not believe that this woman would be so proud of taking some poor guy’s $500 that she would share it enthusiastically with a complete stranger.  I mean, she was delighted with herself. She thought she was the luckiest, smartest gal in the land. She had no idea what I was really thinking. What most anyone would be thinking. It was despicable. It was cold and pathetic.

It is one thing to find a dollar on the street with no evident owner and keep it. It is a whole other ordeal to know who the owner is and to rip him off anyways.  This kind of story, to me, is a reminder of how truly sad someone can be when they are poor in morals, decency, and in spirit.  I almost pity the woman for thinking that stealing $500 is something to brag about. Pity her for a bad upbringing, or for giving in to bad influences.  But, then, how can I pity someone so selfish and so heartless? Even when I’m trying to be nice to people, there is no room for that. At that point, it was hard to be civil. What disappoints me is how nice I thought she was at first, but then upon knowing this tale, I realized that she is the type of person I would never want to befriend….  When I think on the experience, I can only resolve to never do anything of that sort, and to raise my family with decency so they know to do the right thing in those situations. I can’t control that woman, but I can control my behavior. And if I ever lose my wallet, I hope to God she doesn’t find it!

 

© Be Nice. Creator and Be Nice.(somethingsonice.wordpress.com), 2008-2009.

A little stool-full of courtesy

First, I apologize for not posting anything in so long!  It has been… well… a difficult August. BUT! It is over over over. So, on with the good stuff!

I was perusing my personal Facebook account today, and got a real kick at what one of my friends posted. It seems that her coworkers had forgotten a very important part of restroom etiquette, and so someone (not she) took it upon themselves to educate the women of the office. Then my friend posted it to share with all of us. (I have no clue who wrote this little blurb, so I apologize for the lack of recognition…)  Without further ado:

What is a Courtesy Flush?
A courtesy flush is meant to be just that, a courtesy for others. If you know ahead of time you are about to pay the price for last night’s over-indulgences, you may want to consider flushing the toilet several times during your visit in order to minimize unpleasant odors. The common belief is that most unpleasant odors are generated between delivery and reception, if you get my drift. This type of courtesy flush is supposed to take the offenders out of the game as soon as possible, thus reducing the total exposure time for others.

Now ladies I know some of us don’t want to admit that yes, girls poo too. But come on. You do it. And it stinks. Admit, and move on. (Me and my gal pals on the other hand can’t stop talking about our bodily functions. It’s a source of daily humor in our conversations!!!)

And to you water conservationists, remember: your poo might not smell that bad to you, but that bean burrito from last night has a funny way of making other people want to ralph. So save them the trauma and spend the extra water. You’re clever–you’ll find other ways to make up for the extravagance.

 

© Be Nice. Creator and Be Nice.(somethingsonice.wordpress.com), 2008-2009.

Paying it forward

Have you ever seen that movie, “Pay It Forward” (with Kevin Spacey, Helen Hunt, and Haley Joel Osment)? Excellent film. I watched it years ago (it was released in 2000) and it was truly inspirational.  A very brief description of the film is that a young boy tries to change the world through direct action by creating the idea of “paying it forward.” He decides that he will do three nice things, and when those people thank him, he then asks them to pay it forward to three more people. This rule thus creates a domino effect of niceness.

I highly recommend that you watch this movie, or at least embrace the spirit of the idea. I think of it often, especially when nice things are done for me–such as my friends Heather and Derec helping me move last week. They were incredibly selfless of their time and their energy (especially when you consider the number of heavy books I have!). After something generous like that, I try to send that positivity out through my own actions–both to new people and to repay the people who were first kind to me. I like to think too, that the more positive actions you implement, the more positive deeds you will receive, so it is worthwhile twice over. Try it out and pay attention to how this change in behavior affects your day!

 

© Be Nice. Creator and Be Nice.(somethingsonice.wordpress.com), 2008-2009.

Too much

I am constantly reminded that not everyone is as outgoing and friendly and upbeat as me.  I get picked on for it (sometimes jokingly, sometimes seriously). I try to remind myself that it’s okay to be different when people make those comments. Every person is some sort of “too much”: too quiet or too talkative, too temperamental, too high-strung, too judgmental, too religious, too angry, too bawdy, too laid back, and so on. I believe these “too” statements have to do with the person on the receiving end feeling out of control or overwhelmed. On occasion, it never hurts to temper my personality for others–especially when I’m at work. But I have to guard against being someone I’m not. Eventually that sort of behavior will make a person miserable. So be yourself, and just remember that being who you are might not jive with other people all the time. And that isn’t your fault (unless you’re hurting them in some way). It’s the nature of being an individual, and it’s what keeps life interesting!

 

© Be Nice. Creator and Be Nice.(somethingsonice.wordpress.com), 2008-2009.

Bad motorcyclist! Bad!

How many of you have parked in, or blocked, a disabled parking space (or ramp) for convenience? Just a quick run inside–it won’t hurt anyone, right? Well, it might not hurt anyone, but it terribly insensitive.

Last night, I dropped off my fiance at work and saw that a motorcyclist had parked his or her bike in the loading zone between two disable parking spots, rendering the loading area completely useless (and therefore the spots very useless). The nerve! Perhaps the biker thought it was more considerate to take that space than a standard parking space (the latter of which can be annoying indeed, but it isn’t illegal or nearly as insensitive). That driver made a misguided decision. Imagine being a person in a wheel chair. Not only might you have to traverse snow-piled sidewalks in the winter (often rendering you home-bound in snowy conditions), but getting around in general can be difficult. So consider the frustration one might feel if they could not utilize the parking area designated for loading and unloading wheel chairs. Especially when the spots are there specifically for the disabled. Frustrating.

With this in mind, here is some information to know and some easy things you can do to be more considerate to disabled individuals:

• Shovel the snow off your sidewalks after the snowplows have passed (so the person can get to the street).
• Never ever park in a disabled spot (or loading area) if you do not have the correct certification.
• Don’t assume a disabled person is incapable of doing things for themselves. If they need help, they will ask. You can offer assistance, but be sure to always ask first before acting.
• Never pet a guide dog or feed them treats.
• Guide animals are allowed in all public places including restaurants and hotels.
• Don’t touch a person’s wheelchair or scooter without permission. To many, it is an extension of their body, making that action offensive or off-putting.
• Don’t ask a person’s disability. That is incredibly inappropriate.
• Don’t assume that a disability is visible from the exterior. Many illnesses, such as multiple sclerosis, may not be visibly in its early stages.
• Hold doors, hold elevators, hit the disabled door-opener button, press the elevator floor, and many other courteous actions which you would do for anyone!
• Support businesses run by the disabled. An example of this is Uptown Bill’s Small Mall in Iowa City, Iowa. Click on the link to read Bill’s story.
• Volunteer for associations that assist the disabled.

 

© Be Nice. Creator and Be Nice.(somethingsonice.wordpress.com), 2008-2009.

Red (Faced) Tape at the DMV

In the DMV the other morning, I noticed the most appalling behavior. A  DMV worker, let’s call her Sally,  was managing a customer’s routine request (let’s call her Ronda). Sally told Ronda  to fill out a few specific forms in an informative tone, which should have resolved her problem. Immediately Ronda threw her hands on her hips and became very snippy with Sally. Speaking to her like a child, Ronda indicated she had filled out the forms and said, “If you would stop and listen to what I am saying instead of jumping to conclusions, maybe you might understand what I am saying.”  Unphased by Ronda’s tone and courteous still, Sally said, “I’m sorry. Please explain what you need.” The conversation continued and within a few moments Ronda snapped at Sally again , “That’s why I’m here! I didn’t step into line on a whim. That guy over there told me to come here and speak with you. And don’t you think I’m about to keep running back and forth because you all don’t seem to know how to do your jobs.”  The conversation continued from there, with Ronda continually growing angry at the ever-calm Sally. I phased out at that point to tend to my own business, but it left me with a lot of thoughts about what transpired.

First, since when did adults believe it is acceptable to behave like toddlers? Ronda threw a tantrum in the DMV fully expecting everything to go her way because she expressed her anger. In my opinion, I would think being kind and courteous would have facilitated the resolution to her complaint much more quickly.

Second, when Ronda grew upset from the start, it was clear to me that she would have gotten angry at anybody. Sally was just the first face to come along. That isn’t very considerate of Ronda. It is fine to be upset with the red tape in our law system, but the people behind the counters don’t make the rules. They are likely as frustrated as you are with the system. What would have been better in this situation would be to ask questions to clarify what Sally meant while including the fact that Ronda had indeed filled out some forms.

My third feeling about this event was admiration! Sally kept her cool with Ronda, even after Ronda insulted Sally’s ability to listen and do her job. Amazing. Sally is an example of a terrific employee and person. Rather than accelerate the situation by reacting to Ronda, Sally provided information and assistance clearly and calmly to her and managed to get the frustrated customer out of the DMV without any major incident.